And then they “Go Off to College” – A Testimony

My favorite guide for raising my daughters is found in Deuteronomy 6:7-9. It says, “Repeat them (laws, traditions, scriptures) again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. 8 Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” There is no question that my girls (or their friends) can’t ask me. I will answer every question as honestly and biblically as I possibly can.

So I tried to do everything RIGHT with my girls. I tried to answer all their questions; even the hard ones. I took them to church, taught them to serve and then one day my oldest daughter went off to college. We sent her off to discover life for herself, with godly discipline and character behind her. And then…we were disappointed.

There is a reason Solomon tells us in Proverbs 22:6 to “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” Even though I had taught my daughter the best way I knew how, she had to learn life lessons on her own. I had to love her enough to let her learn the hard way.

I asked her if she would like to share some things she learned during that time in her life. Her name is Michele and the guinea pig (firstborn) of our family. Here is what she had to share with you guys:

“I think I was a little different than most teenagers. Starting at 13, I understood my parents reasoning behind the rules, and that probably saved my life. Most teens go through a phase where they feel like their parents don’t know anything about the teenager’s life and what they’re going through, so they must not know what they’re talking about. As a result, they’ll stray a bit and rebel against their parent’s rules, maybe go to church less often or not at all.

My time of rebellion was once I graduated high school and moved away to college. Because I was insistent on doing my own thing and thinking I knew best, God was not at the top of my priority list. I hardly ever thought about Him or asked his opinion. When my parents asked if I was going to church on the weekends, my excuse was “I don’t have time.” Of course I didn’t have time, because I didn’t make time. You make time for things that are important to you.

Ok, so about obeying your parents…you obey because God has commanded you to. In fact, the first commandment in the bible with a promise attached to it is Exodus 20:12. “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” Sounds to me like that’s kind of important.
If your parents are Christians, you obey them knowing they are striving to teach you what is right and want the best for you. No parent is perfect, just like no teenager is perfect. The way to deal with that is to LOVE. This is my biggest thing lately. Love your parents enough to see their intentions and forgive them when they make the wrong choice in how to deal with something.

If your parents are not Christians, there is always a chance that the way they are leading is not in line with God’s law. What do you do then? Just blow them off and have a bad attitude, treating them like they’re stupid? NO! According to Romans 13:1, everyone must submit to authority. In Matthew 22:37-40, Jesus says your first priority/responsibility is to love God with everything in you. So, God’s commands are MOST important. And the second is to love others as yourself (or as God loves you). The key to obeying the rules, laws, and commandments is to Love God and Love People.

If your parents are asking you to do something you believe is wrong, you still must respect and honor them, but you CAN tell them how you feel. If you are following God and respectfully informing your parents that you do not agree and don’t feel comfortable doing what they have asked. If you are in line with the Bible, then you have fulfilled your responsibilities. But you must ALWAYS respect authority.”
Michele

ALL I CAN SAY IS WOW!!! So when Solomon said that if I taught my daughter right, gave her discipline and showed her how to live like Jesus, then one day when she walked away to do her own thing, she WOULD return to God because she LOVES HIM. I am one thankful Mom. Now only 7 more daughters to go. (sigh, sigh and sigh some more) If Michele’s story resonated with you, leave me your story. I’d love to hear how God has redeemed your life.